Friday, February 23, 2007


Last night I had my final meeting with Alice. It's crazy how quickly a year can go by. When the end of our first 6 months came upon us, I knew I was not ready to stop working with her. I had not met many of the goals that I had set out for myself upon entering the program:

1. finding a new job
2. losing weight
3. creating an exercise routine
4. learning to eat healthier

As I look over this list, I can see that I have met my goals and then some. Driving over to Fruition, my mind focused on all that I had accomplished in the past year. Alice helped me to get very clear about what it was that I wanted in a job. Once I had found the key characteristics that I was looking for, she helped me to put them into positive affirmations. (Instead of saying "I don't want to feel drained at the end of the day" it became "I want a job that engages me and gives me energy"). Then I would ask for these things everyday. The job that I now have is exactly what I asked for: a warm, friendly environment that I look forward to coming to each day, working with people who are helpful and kind, making the amount of money I want, I am in the city (just a 10 minute bus ride from home), and the job provides flexibility. Beyond what I asked for, there is a gym on campus, so I can exercise after work. And they will pay for my education when I decide to get my Master's degree (which I have been thinking about and will hopefully begin next summer). When I said these things out loud last night, Alice and I were giddy with excitement and really in awe of the fact that, even though it took time, I got everything I wanted and more!

My weight is dropping and I am about halfway to my ideal weight. I've been to the acupuncturist (one of my rewards for making it to a certain weight), which was amazing. The difference between this Eastern version of medicine versus Western doctors really struck me. The acupuncturist sat with me for 30-40 minutes talking about my health-any and all conditions from physical to emotional. Usually doctors are in such a hurry that I don't even give them all of my physical symptoms before they've prescribed a bottle of pills and sent me on my way. At the end of this discussion, she came to the conclusion that I had a spleen deficiency and so put the needles along the meridian lines that would move energy blocks to and from this area. While laying on the table with the needles in me, an eye pillow resting over my eyes, and soft beach sounds playing in the background, I had a tranforming meditative experience. For about 20 minutes, I lay there with thoughts gently running through my mind. I wasn't frustrated that my mind wouldn't get quiet. I just watched my thoughts. After that I slipped into a state where I saw colorful visions playing on my mind's screen. A bright, fiery ball of yellow that sizzled downward. Flashes of blue flames. Pieces of a vivid drawing that looked like a tattoo on someone's arm. They would come and go. When it came time to come back into reality, I took the eye pillow off and there was soft, beautiful, blurred white light flowing into the room. The entire event was refreshing.

I am starting to look toward my next weight loss reward: a tattoo of the chakras going up my spine. I have an artist in mind and we are in the process of finding a time to meet. I came up with the idea months ago, but knew that it needed to be a symbol of growth and that I would get it once I felt that something (anything, everything) had shifted in me. I am at that place now. I want to get it done before my birthday in May, since I really feel like this year, my 27th year, has been the year of change. I'll send pictures once it's done!

Needless to say, upon coming to the final session this time around, Alice and I both knew I had come to the end, even though the end is really a new beginning for me.

No comments: